I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

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What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

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A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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What did the ginger say to the blond? Hello, what is your name?

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What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

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So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

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What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

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Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

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How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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