Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

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Knock, Knock... Who's there? Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

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what's the difference between fulham and sunderland ? hugh grant and lilly allen's dad

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

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Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

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how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

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why do you care?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Why is MLA important? Because if Mothers didn't Love Anyone society would collapse and we would go into a nuclear war and blow up the earth, and the apocalypse would happen and dinosaurs would rule once again until another meteor hits the earth.

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What kind of jokes to dairy farmers tell? Corny jokes.

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If E = cos[(6x+8) + 5x!] + tan(90-X)^2, and x = 137/43, what is E? The fifth letter of the alphabet.

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

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*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

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What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

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What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

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Why aren't 4 black people driving a red mustang? They can't afford it.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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captcha: all yer base

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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Your mom is intimately familiar with many mens' penis due to her many years as a successful urologist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops