Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did Helen Keller say to the leper? Buaaaaguuuhloo

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One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

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Electronic Arts is a respectable company.

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Why did the lonely man stop talking? He was alone.

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Why did the police officer arrest Maxwell? Because he's black.

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What does a blond see when she looks at a dog? A four legged mammal, refered to as canis lupus familiaris, or what is commonly known as a dog.

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Womens' Rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

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Why did the boy like watching NASCAR? He didnt because he was a fish and a secret Soviet spy

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy A: Blue fuzz

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If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

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why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.

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yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

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Q. Why did the woman fall out of the tree? A. Cause she got laid

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops