Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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lol

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What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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