I died shortly after writing this.

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"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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How do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge? Well, because there's an elephant in your fridge.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He loved working with tourists.

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Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

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Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

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Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

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bob saget

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Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

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what happened to the man with no arms or legs when he was pushed down a hill? nobody knows he is still going ........................................................................

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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Women's rights.

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chuck norris

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Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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