What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

What do you call a group of angry unemployed black guys? The NBA

A blind man walks into a pole.

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

Woman.

Knock Knock Who's there? I bought a Jeep

Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

A muslim walks into a bomb store. He is a police officer and quickly arrests the owners of the store because of the obvious legal violations.

What is cold? Winter

Libyans stage a protest. They get massacred.

Life is an elephant, get married.

How do you get a jew out of an empty pool? Give him a lader

knock knock. come in.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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