A jewish lady is cleaning a house to make some extra money. Its great that she can still find work in this economy.

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Coffee just isn't his cup of tea.

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Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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what if i told you that leonardo decaprio didnt need an oscar but an oscar needed a leonardo decaprio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(_)_)=============D

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what's black and blue and red all over? nothing, you're and idiot.

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whats 2+2? 4

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A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back. And 6 million in the ashtray

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What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

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What is 4 letters and made out of wood? Wood.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

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Why did the shark put on a dress? She was getting ready for prom.

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How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

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A black man, a white man and a Mexican are in a car... Who is driving... A police man

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one day four teenage boys started doing drugs. They jumped off a cliff and died.

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What's the shittiest thing ever ? Poop.

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What did one hipster say to the other hipster? I'm not a hipster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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