What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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An boy with ADHD walks into a

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

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why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

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Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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Old guitars sound like cat's guts

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Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

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Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=LJP1DphOWPs#!

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

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What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

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why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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