Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? The Ferrari is expensive and the babies are in a nice hospital.

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

If there are 3 apples, and Johnny takes away 3 of them, how many apples does Johnny have? None, because Johnny got hit by a train.

What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

Snausages.

Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

69

Whats worse than finding a bad anti-joke on this website? Dieing of Genital Warts

What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

colby doesnt shave

ecks! why zee?

bob saget

Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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