Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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What did the victim say to the rapist? If you're gonna rape me, at least let me go get you a condom

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What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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Your mama is so fat she has a high BMI and is at a high-risk of Type II Diabetes.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

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One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

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A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

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what if i told you that leonardo decaprio didnt need an oscar but an oscar needed a leonardo decaprio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(_)_)=============D

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There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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How do you get a jew out of an empty pool? Give him a lader

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Why did the prostitute survive the gunshot? She was wearing a bulletproff vest.

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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some of these so called "anti-jokes" are real joke s- they don't belong on anti-joke. they are very funny but are traditional jokes that use cliched non-sequitor as punchlines.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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