Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? It is rapidly becoming outdated and most cellphones these days have the time, but if they like the style they are free to use one.

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SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

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How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

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26 because if 25 is funnier than 24, 26 should be even funnier right?

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What does a black man do when he breaks into a car? He steals the radio

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

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Two aspies don't walk into a bar.

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roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? 10 dead trashcans in 1 baby

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Chuck Noris

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bum sex lol

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why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

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Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

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Wanna hear a joke? Denver Broncos.

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wood cant chuck wood

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A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

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There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

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What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

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Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

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Q: Why was Sally crying? A: Because someone punched her in the face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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