When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q:How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could would A: 26

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a catcher's mitt and Lou Ferrigno? If you seriously said "I don't know, what?" I suggest getting a medical examination by a professional psychologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the cure to Ebola? Suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a man who eats a swordfish at 11 o'clock? Dead by midnight.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops