Yo mamas so fat

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Whats white and sticky? Rotten milk.

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squirrels with massive bonerss

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Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

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Luckily Captain America was able to rescue Hitler just before he was trapped in the ice for many years... Thanks to his brave efforts the war continued many more years! Captain America under ice: Why do I get the feeling I did something wrong? Hmm... 30 years later Cap: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMNNNNNN!!!!!! Moral: On ice, tickets sold out... no clothing required, ladies only, None under 16!

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Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

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Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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One cold winter day in Russia, a man asked a tree if he was cold. The tree did not reply, and the man became depressed.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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what is sad about gingers ? they are an unrecognised visible minority.

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How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

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What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

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What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

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Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

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How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

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why did the boy drop his ice-cream? because he got hit by a bus

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What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

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What did the pie say to the other pie? "I'm hungry" So he ate the other pie.

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I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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