What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's black, blue and smells like fish? A dead penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Here is something new Violets are violet NOT FUCKING BLUE

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Blonde walks into a bar. Man walks up to blonde and says a pick-up line. Blonde says "Crap, this is a gay bar?"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Gary: How many sides does a triangle have? Juan: 2? Gary: Nope, it's 3, nice try

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

thumb_up thumb_down +2

And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Robin, get in the batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Boy:well you merry me. Girl:no Boy: why not? Girl:becuase you're rapeing me

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops