What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

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what is worse than finding a worm in your apple the earth exploding

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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Civil Rights.

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Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

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Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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knock knock come in

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a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

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What do you call a black person at a 7-11? A customer.

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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Joe: it says gullible on the ceiling Jack: yes, I wrote it -by Ross

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What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? If you know the answer then you should probably stop sniffing paint.

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Just kidding! Redheads arn't real.

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Bob and his family were looking forward to going to an all inclusive holiday to Spain. When they got on the plane, a bomb went off, causing Bob to realise that he was never going to see his family again, and that they were about to suffer a horrific, painful death.

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Does this napkin smell like chlorofoam?

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the dog say to the cat before they fought? Lets fight

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You have been brought down to hell where you are welcomed by satan. "Welcome to hell, where you watch your loved ones get tortured for all eternity" Satan said "Where is everyone? " you ask "Hmmm, I guess you were never really loved"He replied

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So this guy comes into a bar... Jizz eveywhere.

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what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

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Lol! Why you wanna know?

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Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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