Whats blue and smells like red paint? If you know the answer then you should probably stop sniffing paint.

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Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

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Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

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Does pizza sound good for dinner?

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what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

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What did Uncle Timmy give to Little John for his birthday? Sodomy.

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A muslim walks into a gay bar.

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roses are red violets are blue you're an orphan, had to break the news...sorry little fella.

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I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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What's black, blue and smells like fish? A dead penguin.

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Blonde walks into a bar. Man walks up to blonde and says a pick-up line. Blonde says "Crap, this is a gay bar?"

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Roses are red Here is something new Violets are violet NOT FUCKING BLUE

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Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

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Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

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So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

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Boy:well you merry me. Girl:no Boy: why not? Girl:becuase you're rapeing me

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And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

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What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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