Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime lying in a pool of blood.

what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

What's 4+7 47

Why did the fat prick post on the internet? Because he was MorningAfterBoy

Obama

Whats funnier than a Dead Baby in a bathtub? Nothing Thats as good as it gets!

So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

Why did the bus drop a boy holding ice cream? Its driver was not paying full attention on the road and was sentenced 15 years for manslaughter.

What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

Q. If Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were both drowning, what kind would you make? A. PBJ

What is white and stands in the corner? A refridgerator who has been very bad...

Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

How do you make a black man sad? You kill and mutilate his family maliciously

What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

When life gives you lemons... wait that wont happen

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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