Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

What do you get when you cross a horse and a donkey? a mule

Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, some dude ran it over.

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

yuor momma so fat she has type 2 diabetes

How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

What's red and hurts you? A brick.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

5

why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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