What's spotted and has dildos strapped to their neck? Jews

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

How do you make a baby float? 1 can root bear 2 scoop baby

Knock Knock. Who's there. To. To who. To whom.

4 black people in a car drive of a cliff. the sad thing is there was a extra seat.

What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

Where did the little girl go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Why, you might ask, did in fact the chicken cross this all too infamous road? His grandma-ma phoned the righteous bird and requested a visit. Chickens never displease their family.

"Doctor," I said while poking my head, "My head hurts!" I poked my knee. "My knee hurts, too!" Then I tried touching my arm. "OW! So does my arm!" I even tried poking my teeth. "OUCH! Even my teeth hurt! What will I do Doctor?" "That's easy," said the Doctor, "I'll fix your finger right away."

*you're

Knock Knock! Come in.

Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

How do you get a nun pregnant? Screw her.

Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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