Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

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Roses are red Violets are fin I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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your father died

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Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

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Why did the gorilla fall on the ground Because it was dead

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

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-Ask me if i'm a crab. -Are you a crab? -No, why would i be a crab?

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Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

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What did the bungee jumper say to his wife? Honey, I'm going bungee jumping today.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

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what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

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how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

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What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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