Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food before? No? Well neither have they.

a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

What do you call 5 of my friends and 5 of your friends hanging out together? I don't know. I don't have any friends.

Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

A black man and a white woman walk out of a mall restroom holding hands and sweating. The white woman is arrested on the spot for statutory rape and sent to prison for 10 years. The black man was barely 16 years old.

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

I have read and agree to the terms of service.

A Squirrel gets ready for hybernation. 21 You Stupid

yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

What's 6 + 9? 15.

Guess what? What? Idk. I just wanted to make u excited.

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

I ate high protein foods and now my flatulence smells wrank.

Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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