how do you get someone out of a chair? hit him with a shovel

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

If shoes could talk they'd tell you that they are not willing support your weight & floors are extremely dirty.

Roses are red Bacon is too Rhyming is hard bacon

An boy with ADHD walks into a

Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

What's Brown and Sticky? A stick.

3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

What do you call a gay black man driving off a cliff? A fine example of the dangers of drink driving.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

So, North Korea is getting ready to nuke the US... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bob saget

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

Yes!

A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...