What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

What's worse than cancer? Death.

What did one hater say to the other hater? I hate you.

How do you stop a black guy from drowning? You take your foot off of his face

I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

I had my period 3 days ago.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

What do a black person and a monkey have in common? A. They both are organism that need food and water to survive.

Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

A white man, a black man, and a mexican were stranded in a giant dessert, They were quick to notice the spelling error and ate happily for a few days

What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

(-(-(-(--)-)-)-) Look the chinese mafia

How many carrots can you fit in a truck Depends who's driving

Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

roses are red violets are blue i uhh umm hold on... the man with Alzheimers proceeds to think of the rest of his poem he wrote for his date, after an hour he remembers but his date has left and the staff proceed to guide him out and back to the insane asylum

yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

Knock Knock Who's there? Rob Rob! I haven't seen you in ages come on in.

Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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