What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

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Two hillbillies are sitting in a van. It's friday and one of them suggests they should play a game of 20 Questions. The other one agrees. The first hillbilly thinks of the word 'donkey dick'. - Is it something you can eat? the second hillbilly asks. - Yes, the first one replies. - Is it a donkey dick? - Yes.

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poo is yummy

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4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

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A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children driving off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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What are little Timmy's hopes and dreams? Destroyed.

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Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

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Knock Knock! .... Knock Knock! ... There seems to be nobody at home...

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

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Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He loved working with tourists.

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If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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