What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

Mitch

What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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