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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

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What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

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JFK

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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