What is an Anti-Joke? This is.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

:O + :P = 69

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Want to hear a cat joke? Just kitten.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How much does a polar bear way? Near 1,100 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Wanna hear a joke? Sure Niiiiggggeeee what is the last letterThe last letter is NOT and R! Its an R. Good job honey

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

I'm banging your sister.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What is brown and sticky? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

thumb_up thumb_down +34

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's black and white and red allover and can't fit through the door? A nun with a spear through her neck

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

thumb_up thumb_down +34

democracy

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops