did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

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What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

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What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

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JFK

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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