What do you say to Michael and Justin? The Game

so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

What's worse then ten dead babies in a garbage can? Being the one who found them.

A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

Did you hear about the man who thought his wife was trying to kill him? He's dead.

What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

Proof reading

Why did the white man kill the black man? Because he was a racist that didn't care much for black people or their ways.

Whats green and has 4 wheels? A green car.

What's black and white and red all over? Colors

a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

So a guy with ADD walks into a... Hey Look! A Chicken!

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

Why are children like books? They are highly flammable if covered in gasoline.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Why did the Jewish man dive into the street to pick up a penny? He was Tevye, a character from the famous play Fiddler on the Roof and pennies are valuable and rare in Tsarist Russia in 1905.

why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

Q: why do shower heads have 11 holes? A: Jews only have 10 fingers

What does an owl and a mole have in common? They both live underground, apart from the owl

How do you avoid dying? You can't everything dies.

Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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