What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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Why did the white girl have a black friend? Because she was very welcome to different races and wanted to learn about her culture.

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What do you have if you have a green ball in your right hand and a green ball in your left hand? Two green balls.

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Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

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Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

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What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

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how do you make a baby cry kick it off a cliff

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What did the dog say to the mailman? nothing, dogs lack the mental capacity for human speech therefore he was unable to communicate his message verbally

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Why was the duck in jail? For Smoking...Quack!!

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knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

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Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

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What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

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An elephant walks up to a camel and says why have you got a pair if boobs on your back, the camel the replies that's a funny question coming from someone with a dick on their face.

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Why did the Filipino man get small condoms? Because he's not black.

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why was the boy running? because his skin was burning off

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What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

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Q) Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest A) Real Joke : Because the parrots-eat-em-all

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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Shut up and stop laughing, Daddy's balls aren't gonna lick themselves.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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