How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Where is Madeline McCann? 6 Feet under....

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

do you want to hear a joke 123456789 987654321 boo!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +17

-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

thumb_up thumb_down +17

So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't because it had died from an uncaring mother and father that dumped it's corps on the side of the highway.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did one hater say to the other hater? I hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the boy do when he got an F on his English paper? -Laughed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What goes good with coca cola? Thirst

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops