A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

Yo sugars so salty when you put it on your french fries they taste like salty french fries

Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

whats worse then a baby with out floaties?.......beating your grandma to death with a puppy

Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

Nothing yet CC

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? words

what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

a potato flew around my room

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

What is the best thing about chuck norris? hes holding a gun to my hea

Johan showering. . . AWK

my mom raped yerr foot

I pooped my pants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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