call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken had no legs and was therefore incapable of committing to such a challenge.

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What's a cow's favorite vacation spot? the slaughterhouse.

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whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

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Man: Are you tired Woman: No why? Man: You have bags under your eyes and you just yawned a minute ago

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

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a man walks into a bar....... thats it.

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why did the indian kill the buffalo? he was suffering from a psychological disorder and took to killing innocent animals in order to relieve the pent up rage caused by repressed memories of childhood abuse.

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my friend is gay hes gay

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whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

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I got shot once it hurt a lot

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Knock Knock . . . I'm coming in!

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How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

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What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

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Why does it take more than one blond to replace a light bulb? Because one had no arms, thus requiring the help of another person. It just so happened that that other person was a blond.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, get out of the garden it's time for lunch.

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I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

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Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

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black guy graduating high school

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car> "Get in the car."

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What is 2+2? 4!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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