Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

What did the gun say to the pencil? Draw

What did the African do when he found out he was constipated? He ate a laxative and went to the toilet

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? They were tossing frisbee and accidentally threw it into their neighbors yard.

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

How did the mermaid break her arm? She fell out of a tree.

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

How do u get an A in algebra? Train a possum.

what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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