A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

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why was the boy sad He had a frog stapled to his face

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Whats The Difference Between A Baby And A Watermelon ? You Can Throw One In The Air And Hit It With A Bat , And The Other Ones A Watermelon

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knock knock!! kanye west

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

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what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

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How are a grape and a duck alike? They're both purple... except for the duck.

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My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Dani barton= lovely

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A rabbi and a jew walk into a bar and had lot's of crazy anal sex ... then asked god for forgiveness. the end

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What would the world be like without 1 direction it would still be the world but just without 1 direction

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Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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