There once was a girl named sally with no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally.

123 Main street

What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

What do you call nacho cheese? Stolen.

Why do women have boobs? So they can feed their newborn children without paying for expensive formula

Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

zebras

Why did the Muslim enter the bar? He didn't.

A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

Charlie morgans a pussy EDEN HAZARDS A TANK

who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

Alt F4

Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

Why did spongebob eat Patrick Because he was hungry

Think of your favorite joke. Thats so weird! Thats exactly the same as this joke!

What rhymes with 'stick' and is brown? A stick

What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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