I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An indian boy gets a girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I once heard what I consider the best joke ever: But I am not telling it to you, because this is a the anti-joke section. Moral: You better find the secret "real jokes section" because its there, yeeeeeess yeeeeeeeeees of coursehahahahaha!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A physician, an engineer, and an attorney were discussing who among them belonged to the oldest of the three professions represented. But neither one of them knew.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Lisa’ house needed to be painted and her brother offered to do it for her. Lisa thought it was a nice gesture and told him that she wanted the house in antique white. However; after painting the house, Lisa noticed that her brother had used a color with a dark yellow tone. ”Are you sure this is Antique white?” she asked him. ”Offcourse!” he said. Afraid of hurting his feelings, Lisa didn’t dare to say anything. Ten years later, the house needed to be painted again. This time Lisa wanted to hire a professional painter, but her brother insisted on doing for her. He brought the paint, which Lisa recognized as the same yellow paint, with a color that Lisa had really begun to hate. ”Brother, are you sure this is antique white?” she asked, forcing a seriousness in her voice. ”Offcourse!” he answered, and Lisa was still too embarressed to object. Her brother didn’t have an easy life and she didn’t want to break his confidence. So the house was painted, same as before. Lisa did however notice a strange light in her brothers eyes. Another ten years passed, and the house needed to be painted a third time. This time however Lisa had had enough. Though it was her brother, she had become increasingly ashamed of her house had even stopped having guests over. With a deep breath she picked up the phone and called up her brother, ready to confront him. A woman answered; it was his wife. She could hardly speak because of her sobbing. Unfortunately Lisa’s brother had been killed in a car accident earlier that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse then any minority? inter-minority breeding.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If u wanna get high, smoke weed

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A white man and woman are married and the wife becomes pregnant. However, the wife has been having an affair with an African American man. The baby turns out to be white and so the woman was very fortunate or else the husband would have figured it out for sure.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Janelle fail her math test? Because she didn't study.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Mr Webb *Hit keyboard loudly* -...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference of 13 and 4? 9

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What has two legs, but cant walk? Steven Hawking

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did I put the baby into the blender feet first? So I could see its facial expression

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call nacho cheese? Stolen.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

This is not a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Recent US presidents (and their accompanying economy)

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops