Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

A Woman decides she wants to stop making sanwiches for her sexist boyfriend. She walks away and lives a happy life. In hell.

What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

today i wanted to write a joke...... a joke

What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

Gauss what ur mama said last night nothing i found her dead

Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

There were three people on a plane, the plane crashed and they all died.

Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

Why can't Sally ride a bike? Because Sally's a fish.

How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

Why did the Nazi shoot the Jew in the head? Because he was a Jew. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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