Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

What's stupid and a waste of time? Anti joke .com because people on here are too ignorant and serious cuz it's not funny. It's anti joke G-Dang it. Come on seriously

Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and a man? Nothing. I was lying about their being a difference.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stranded on a desert island for a few weeks. They get to know each other really well.

What do a jew and a black have in common? God hates both of them

A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

What is the difference between black people and HIV? They are of a specific ethnicity whom which share specific ideals and background; whilst the other is a virus contracted from sexual intercourse.

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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