What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese

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What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

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whats the difference between colby and a high schooler? Colby hasn't matured yet

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A man is so drunk that the alcohol has a biphasic effect on the body, meaning that its effects change over time. Initially, alcohol typically produces feelings of relaxation and cheerfulness. Increased consumption, however, can lead to dehydration, coordination problems, blurred vision, and a great number of health, medical, and social issues and other drinking problems caused by alcoholism. As articulated above, excessive alcohol consumption can lead to drunkenness. One of the short term effects of intoxication is the lowering of an individual's inhibitions. As a consequence, when people are intoxicated they frequently do things they normally would not do while sober, often ignoring legal, ethical, social, and moral or religious norms. While blurred vision, slurred speech, dehydration, and coordination can be labeled as "alcohol short term effects," other health problems such as alcohol related heart disease, liver disease, and cancer, on the other hand, can be labeled as long term effects of alcohol abuse and alcoholism. This, however brief, is an overview of the effects of alcohol. What remains to be discussed, however, is what Paul Harvey calls "the rest of the story." Essentially, "the rest of the story" is a more detailed analysis of how excessive alcohol affects an individual's life and the lives of those around him or her when the person becomes an alcoholic and suffers from alcoholism. Perhaps the most logical way to discuss this complex topic is to focus first on the classic alcoholic behaviors and effects of alcohol in the four states of alcoholism; then examine some of the "social effects" of alcohol and alcoholism and finally, discuss the medical conditions, health issues, and drinking problems that are caused directly or indirectly by alcoholism.

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Roses are red violets are blue whats the opposite of skiny again cause i think that's you

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What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

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What's big, brown, and barks? Tree

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What's worse than finding half a sticker in your apple Half a worm

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Two penguins are in a bathtub, one penguin asks the other "can you pass the soap?" the other penguin says "what do I look like? A toaster?"

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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want to hear a bird joke? no well, this is hawkward

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What do you get when you mix a mexican and a frenchman? A person of mixed racial heritage.

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What's red and has wheels a red car....

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whats water and frozen? an ice cube

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Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

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Hey, are you 5? Ya I am 5 inches deep in your MOM!!

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What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

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What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream cone? Because he was hit by a truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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