Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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A black man walks into a bar. A few minutes later a jewish man enters. Next door, a twelve year old girl is crying over the tragic death of her mother due to terminal cancer.

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Why did the girl ask her brother for aids? Because her room was a mess

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Person 1 What's good? Person 2 Your mom's love making

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Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

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Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

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womens rights

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How do u shit With ur ass

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Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

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Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

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What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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