Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

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What looks like half an apple? The other half.

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Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

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Why was Adolf Hitler such a bad man? Because he never kissed his wife goodbye.

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Knock, knock (No one was home)

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What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

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knock knock whos there? how should I know?

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What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

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Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

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What do you call a black priest? Religious.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops