Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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Garry Glitters on here

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because it is very unsafe for blind individuals to operate motor vehicles.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

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Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

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What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

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What's 9+10=? 19

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Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

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How do you confuse a Mexican? several large eggs

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, AIDS

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Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

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A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

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What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

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*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

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Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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