Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

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your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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whats worst than the holocaust? the holocaust times 2

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

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Women Voting

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Whats worse than finding bubba in your house? Getting raped by a rabid racoon..

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Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

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Why did Adele suck the doctors dick? LOL, did you think the doctor really got her to open her mouth all the time so he could "look at her sick throat"

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Hey, we're both lawyers.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob Who? Bob the human.........

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What's worst than failing your test? AIDS

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[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

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What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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how many rapists does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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