Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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What happened when Chuck Norris tried to divide by zero? He found that he was not very good at math, and moved on to another joke concerning himself.

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69, hahaha

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Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

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Go in public and say this You-it smells like up sexy in here Person-what's up sexy? You-nothing much, how about yo

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ha.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

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What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

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What did the pedophile say to the little girl? "I have a condition and I think it would be healthy for both of us if you stayed within the supervision of your parents"

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What did the man say when he saw a truck in his yard? There's a truck in my yard.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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Q: Why is it sad that nobody was injured in a train crash? A: Because everyone died

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Alt F4

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what do you call a blonde that spends fifteen thousand dollars at a bar? an alchoholic.

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whats red and black and green all over? a paint job gone bad

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Good.

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Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

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monkey sponge

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A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

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We can beat the holocaust joke as the most liked joke, Please participate with my campaign and like the joke. I really need some attention

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A man was getting surgery on his knee and the surgeon accidentally left a knife in his leg. The man's leg was severely infected and he proceeded to die in the following weeks. His family will mourn this loss for years to come.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops