Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

What has two eyes, two arms and two legs........ a woman who lost her baby to a miscarrage.

I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

Why wasnt the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled

What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

Your mom was diagnosed with aids. Her prognosis was 6 months....clearly this joke is about the Holocaust.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

What do you call a mexican hopping over fences - A parkour Artist

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

get on your knees and make a donut face:)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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