What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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Why did the baby die? I killed it.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

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Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

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Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

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What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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yo mamas so fat, she started working out

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Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

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How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What did the German say the the Jewish man? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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Hitler was Jewish.

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Ass

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PUDDING

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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