Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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