How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

Amputations.

Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

69

What do you call a former pope. Dead!

what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

Whats9+10 19

25

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's black...

World Peace

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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