How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Amputations.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

69

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a former pope. Dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

thumb_up thumb_down +25

two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats9+10 19

thumb_up thumb_down +23

25

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's black...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

World Peace

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops