How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

thumb_up thumb_down +47

If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Traveling Salesman.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Women's sports.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the black man walk into KFC? He was terribly hungry and had a reasonable amount of currency with him to purchase food for his well being.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do u call a women between to black guys? -loose

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops