What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

Hey Nerochan, how high is your IQ?

Canada's army

Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...