The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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hi

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

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So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

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uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

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Microsoft Windows

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

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how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops