Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What is 69? A two digit number.

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

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Sea World Japan.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

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your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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What's worst then lose 100$ Lose 101$

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- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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